I’m not working right now, but thanks for the offer
March 25th, 2009
Every so often I make the mistake of eating at the complex’s cafeteria at dinner time. Sometimes this is because I’m staying late and am having a killer Quake tournament going on and I’m “stress testing” our ‘Net connection to ensure all’s good. Oh, but I make sure I give myself maximum bandwidth and allow emails to trickle through every so often. Can’t have this place shut down completely, of course. But anyway…
I was enjoying some time to myself in the cafeteria with a few pounds of rare roast beef when an enduser sits down from me and tells me her laptop won’t power on. I look at the clock (showed 6:30pm), looked at her then looked at the clock again. Of course, I get the “well-whadda-ya-gonna-do-about-it” stare in return. “Two can play at that game,” I thought. So I return the same stare. Now, I’m really good at this game even though my eyeballs turned into two cotton balls after about three minutes but SHE BLINKED FIRST, DAMNIT!!! WOO HOOO!!!! *clearing throat* I finally tell her that I’m not technically working right now and really just wish to enjoy my dinner.
Enduser: “Well, what are you doing *here* then??”
Me: *staring down at the plate of cooling roast beef* “I was kinda, sorta thinking about eating this drippy bloody side of a dead cow. Hey, is that an artery???” (did I mention this woman’s a vegetarian?)
Enduser: *making gagging noises* “I…ummmm….I think I’ll just come back…” *tears out of the cafeteria towards the rest rooms* (Too bad those particular restrooms are locked after 6pm. I wonder if she found another place to spew.)
Needless to say, I did really well playing Quake. Maybe I should eat dead drippy cow more often.
